I’ve been away for a while partly because I had a bit of a challenging week. Hearing bad news sort of compromises my fondness for low humour and knob gags. As Kurt Vonnegut used to say, “So it goes.”

The other reason why I’ve been somewhat, um, prolifically-challenged is because my ISP SNAFU’d and cut-off my broadband connection. I won’t name names, but this isn’t out of some misguided sense of discretion. Hell, no. I’ve read the stories and heard the urban myths: I know that if you bad mouth these people they’ll hunt you down like a dog.

Resolving the situation involved making numerous premium-rate phone calls to various discount-rate people, some of whom claimed I didn’t exist. Maybe they’re right. In case, in a few days I’ve somehow managed to circumnavigate the globe through the medium of call centre.

And I used to think that travel broadened the mind.