Here’s my next batch of 25 favourite films of the last decade, taking us from number 50 to number 26. Each one has a lovingly hand-crafted piece of haiku. Any resemblance to any haiku appearing in any of my previous end of year lists is purely coincidental.
My final batch of favourite films will follow forthwith…
50. Gladiator (dir. Ridley Scott, 2000)
This muscular flick
Made Swords and Sandals look cool
(Got mine from Top Man)
49. Requiem for a Dream (dir. Darren Aronofsky, 2001)
Grange Hill’s Zammo song
Get’s a stark, brutal update
“Just say no… No… NO-O-O!”
48. The Man Who Wasn’t There (dir. Joel Coen/Ethan Coen, 2001)
Barber shop vignette
Something for the weekend, sir?
Try blackmail and death
47. X-Men 2 (dir. Bryan Singer, 2003)
Mutant renegades
In x-ceptional sequel
(Should have left it there)
46. A Scanner Darkly (dir. Richard Linklater, 2006)
Rotoscope dopefest
In this faithful-to-Dick flick
(As in Philip K.)
45. The Hurt Locker (dir. Kathryn Bigelow, 2009)
Iraq War drama
Tense bomb disposal thriller
Might get an Oscar
44. Master and Commander: The Far Side of the World (dir. Peter Weir, 2003)
Russell climbs Crowe’s nest
For great sea battle epic
(Wrath of Khan with boats)
43. Adaptation (dir. Spike Jonze, 2003)
Charlie’s writer’s block
Spawns meta-meditation
On art, and orchids
42. Inglourious Basterds (dir. Quentin Tarantino, 2009)
Don’t burn cinemas
Unless there’s Nazis inside
In which case, it’s OK
41. A History of Violence (dir. David Cronenberg, 2005)
Cronenberg returns
With tale by Dredd comic scribe
(Give Wagner his due!)
40. Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon (dir. Ang Lee, 2001)
Ang’s ode to wire-fu
Breathtaking and beautiful
Martial artistry
39. Fantastic Mr Fox (dir. Wes Anderson, 2009)
Roald Dahl kid classic
Goes stop-motion to Wes World
(It’s no cluster-cuss!)
38. Wall*E (dir. Andrew Stanton, 2008)
Little yellow box
Dreams of love and musicals
Then clears up our mess
37. Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind (dir. Michel Gondry, 2004)
Kaufman classic warns:
‘Be careful what you forget’
(Memories can’t wait)
36. The Prestige (dir. Christopher Nolan, 2006)
Duelling magicians
In cinema sleight of hand
Abracadabra!
35. Oldboy (dir. Chan-wook Park, 2004)
Revenge can be sweet
Live octopus, not so good
It’s the tentacles
34. Toy Story 2 (dir. John Lasseter/Ash Brannon, 2000)
Buzz and Woody back
With new toys, bigger sandbox
Quixote for kids
33. In The Loop (dir. Armando Iannucci, 2009)
Big-screen Thick of It:
In this sharp, sweary satire
‘Fog of war’ turns blue
32. The Lives of Others (dir. Florian Henckel von Donnersmarck, 2007)
Secret policeman
Goes from snooper to cupid
(More to it than that)
31. No Country for Old Men (dir. Joel Coen/Ethan Coen, 2008)
The Brothers Coen
Go bleak and nihilistic
Beware cattle gun!
30. Moon (dir. Duncan Jones, 2009)
Moonbase alpha male’s
Sad existential crisis
(He’s no lunatic)
29. Spider-Man 2 (dir. Sam Raimi, 2004)
Spidey and Doc Ock
Amazing! Spectacular!
Webhead wonderland
28. The Fountain (dir. Darren Aronofsky, 2007)
Tale of love and loss
That might span a thousand years
This one’s from the heart
27. Tell No One (dir. Guillaume Canet, 2007)
Hitchcock is alive
And he’s living in Paris
Here’s Exhibit A
26. Mulholland Drive (dir. David Lynch, 2002)
Tinseltown nightmare
Spawns mesmerising mindfuck
What’s with that blue key?
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